Anyone else have these problems when working from home?

Hey everyone! I am an indie game developer that has been working on my first game for awhile now. I am full time from home and I am running in to a couple of side effects I am hoping other can help me deal with.

The first one is discouragement. I love making games and art and I love programming. I am very excited about making my own game but a lot of times I get overwhelmed and hide like an ostrich. It becomes a perpetuating cycle that is hard to overcome sometimes.

The second one is soul crushing loneliness! Working from home is very lonely. Does anybody have any experience overcoming this? I have no friends, lol.

 

I experience both, unfortunately for me - I can only work usually on short term projects otherwise I get burnt out.
Unless however - my game/tools or whatever else get a lot of hype then it sticks to me.

The biggest factor for me is getting my stuff known, if it's not known and you for example - make a thread about it somewhere and people just look and don't say anything - that's one of the biggest downers I face period.

to me - people not talking on my thread = not interested and it must be crap.

But the second one - I actually prefer the loneliness - people can't be trusted, it's sad but it's a cold hard fact that the majority of real life friends / family will never understand why we are the way we are in game development and they start trashing your dreams down the drain because of one simple fact - they don't understand.

So what I do, even if it isn't possible at this moment in time - I think of my self laughing my way to the bank to withdraw 500 grand to purchase a Lamborghini while they slave away at a 9-5 job making 7.50 an hour, and then think to my self - for everyone who has trashed my dreams and doubted I could ever be successful at what I love to do, they will come to me like I just won the lottery and expect I owe them something, and I'd love them to do that just so I can tell them to F off.

Yeah may not be the best way to look at it, but hey it works for me - and as long as it works for me then I'm good lmao.

 

Well I can't exactly say I know what it's like I have a regular job and only telework once in a while. But What I can tell you is that you should just be grateful you're able to stay at home and do what you love. If I could afford to I would quit and go full time after the dream

 

I think that the best way is to clench your teeth and keep working.

You need to find a friend to hang out with once or twice per week. Otherwise it is (probably) possible to go nuts.
I do not recommend working at nights either, they're depressing and fairly bad for morale. Take walks, do not have groceries delivered to your home and do shopping yourself.
Finding a hobby or some sort of hobby club that involves other people would work. A gym or, say, martial art section, art lessons, dance lessons would work, depending on what suits your fancy. Going to a movie/concert could work too.

A pet could help, too. A couch potato cat that can sit on your lap and purr can give significant boost to your mood, however, cat is long-term commitement, so it is not something that should be taken lightly. That still can't replace human communication completely, so don't get a pet unless you can free time to take care of it.

 

I have very much the same problem. I've been wanting to get into game development full time for a long time, but haven't truly "done" it yet. I've tried to find good people to work with, to try and work off of each other, but all I find is disappointment. So I instead try to stick to solo projects, but doing that alone from home ends up with a situation like yours (for any decent sized game).

What I've decided to do is try to game development full time as my last attempt. Either I make it and can continue with full time game development, and hire a team of people to work with. Or, I fail and quit game development all together. I've set a deadline, buried my nose in it, and I'm either going to succeed or fail miserably.

Being busy can keep my mind off loneliness, and my work ethic doesn't matter, either I work hard and make a good game, or I slack off, fail the deadline and quit game dev.

 

I only do this game dev stuff part-time. I do work from home about 99% of the time meaning about 3 days per year I am not working at home for my job.

Like @N1warhead said the lack of people around is a great thing in my opinion. Of course, I do have daily communication with the team but other then wanting to help them out I'd be very happy to just work in silence. Well not literally silence... sometimes I have some Disturbed or Ozzy or whatever booming while I work. Then there are many times I just enjoy the peace & quiet.

I think @N1warhead also brought up another great point. People aren't all they are cracked up to be. Of course, they are important. And I do enjoy helping people. But just people in general no I don't want them hanging around standing/sitting just doing nothing. That's just a distraction from me getting things done. Now if they were sitting in another room (or possibly in the same room) and actually doing something like making sound FX, graphics, market intelligence gathering, something... anything... then I'd almost certainly welcome having people around.

But obviously I post on here often. Also I have some "friends" I met here and we talk via messages here and / or email.

Don't take this post in the wrong way. I can understand you wanting to have some folks around. I am just saying it makes all of the difference in the world what kind of people you have around. You may even want to consider talking with some of the friends you have made through this forum when you need some human interaction. They will likely be able to relate to you much better than perhaps your own family even as far as your passion for game dev is concerned.

So you can talk to these folks for game dev stuff or even gaming in general. Then talk with your real life family & friends about all of the other stuff.

Anyway, people have asked me that before "don't you get bored or lonely working from home all of the time not seeing people?" Absolutely not is always my answer. There is too much to do to get bored. I have never felt lonely my entire life. But yeah anyway a big part of it is probably because I always have a ton of stuff I want to do. There is just so much to do from actively developing to searching the Internet locating people who share my views on games. In fact every night I go to sleep wishing I had a few more hours I could spend on this stuff. But I also know that no matter how much time I had even all day & night every day I'd still feel the same way.

 

The issue here is that online communication is cheap if not worthless. It is very impersonal and has nearly no impact compared to face-to-face interaction.

(IMO) it is quite unreasonable to expect people to understand anything about you to begin with. That kind of thing require life-time of communication between and you and other person and by default it ain't gonna happen.

The whole "people ain't that cool" doesn't really matter. People are social. Some are more social, some are less social, but social communication usually is a NEED, and unless that need is somehow taken care of, you'll feel bad. There are exceptions, of course, the kind that can live in a cave for 10 years with no human contact, but those are rare and none of you guys would qualify.

 

@neginfinity - I'm talking about people I've known my entire life treat me this way. Not people I just met.
Friends and even family just don't understand. Like they get extremely mad because I don't feel like hanging out with them and would rather work. if I'm not working I feel lost. So I'd rather work than have friends who distract me from working, unless of course they support me, then they can either help me work or get out my face and let me keep working lol.

Heck I love to work so much - Christmas - I'd rather work then be with my family. Work is my other half and completes me. Which is why I don't have a problem working 16+ hours every single day.

 

Hang out in a college's ACM.

Give yourself a proper distraction. Take a break or code while you have a broadcast of information on another tab / window / monitor. Sometimes I feel less stressed and still get a lot done (and more done from taking less breaks) if I have a twitch stream on in the background, occasionally checking on it when there's a lot of commotion.

 

Yes, and this is normal, even for friends and family. People aren't telepaths. Things that are obvious for you are not obvious for others. They don't know what you think and how you think.

 

This fact gave me a lot of grief in high school

 

I worked from home for about 2 years (later in my carreer), the company I was working for reduced in size so much they got rid of their offices, and we all worked from home. I did that for about 6 months and quit to do other freelance gigs. ( did a lot of freelance Ruby development for companies in Belgium and Poland). Mostly games and some enterprise web. I didn't enjoy it. I am not overly social, but that was too much. I got together with some other devs and we sort of made an office to work together even though we were doing separate projects. It helped a lot. Eventually we joined forces and our office became a studio. I learned I work much better and am much happier working with others, even if just a proximity thing and not working on the same project.

 

Yeah I doubt I'd live in a cave for 10 years without human contact but certainly 2 to 3 month stretches of it would be great as long as I had some power to work on my stuff. That'd actually be awesome! Work 2 to 3 months without distractions then come down off the mountain to town and hang out for a day or two. Then go back up for another 2 to 3 months. Now that would be a good life! =)

 

One thing that happens is that when you push yourself too hard, you start to paradoxically experience a sense of disillusionment and a desire to quit. It's because you're putting too much pressure on yourself. As the pressure intensifies it's like putting the brakes on and its a big turnoff. You start reminding yourself of all the stuff you have not done yet, how little progress you already made, and that you should do as much work as you possibly can in as little a time as possible. That's a recipe for disaster, I've found. I always listened to everyone else saying you have to work hard and try hard and spend as much time as possible and make as much progress as possible bla bla bla... it's totally the opposite of what actually works for me. All it did was overwhelm me and make me resentful and resistant, reminded constantly of how much of a failure I am.

Instead my attitude now is to deliberately section off boxes of time, whereby my game project is only allowed to consume a given amount of time and then I must stop and do something else. I deliberately say NO to working on it so that I remain in a sense of control or centerdness. I also tell myself I will only do a small amount today, and I will only do the next most obvious specific thing, and I will not in any way attempt to tell myself I must 'get a lot done' or 'do it all' today. If I can ACCEPT that I am only going to do a small amount and make a small step of progress, and that it's totally okay to then stop, then I have far less pressure on myself and I don't get that horrible symptom of GUILT.

The guilt tells me that no matter how hard I try or push I fail, or no matter how hard I work I won't get far enough, etc... it's a kind of perfectionism that really is driven by INperfectionism, which is the belief that you are not doing enough or are incapable. That drives you nuts. Guilt also tells you that in order to not be guilty you have to work even harder and do even more, which is the exact OPPOSITE of what will work, because then you feel even more pressured and you want to quit even more and then you feel even more guilty. Plus it totally sucks all enjoyment out of it and turns it into unwanted work. Work that you are pressured to do is even worse than work that you are free to do.

You have to do the opposite and not create or listen to the guilt. But if you litsen to it and try to give a perfect performance and massive output and all that, you will fail to do so. Its a paradox but you're much more likely to actually make progress (I'm finding) if you intend NOT to make a lot of progress on purpose. For me, realizing this and stopping listening to the guilt-inducing super-pressure mega-competitive assholes was a huge breakthrough.

Less is more.

 

Yes, exactly. Even those who are in the "I'm not a people person" category will start going crazy after a month or two. Most people NEED human contact even if it is infrequent.

Also, good job making a studio out of this situation.

You think this way because you haven't experienced that, IMO. ^_^

 

Move in with housemates, seriously, I did a long stint working from home and without my flat mates coming home after to work to talk to, I would have gone insane.

Another word of advice from someone who's done this, and witnessed the effects, START RUNNING!

Seriously, get yourself a good pair of running shoes and get out every day and go for a run and get some fresh air. This takes you out of your home bubble and gives you a massive mental refresh, and you'll attack your work with renewed vigour.

If those were the two words of advice I could give someone working from home, those would be it.

EDIT : One more thing, get at least one full day out of the house. Drive somewhere and go visit people, family or whatever, and if you dont have friends, join some meetup.com groups or something, but just set one day a week to be your 'out of the house' day and stick to it.

 

Well, I'm dealing with this regarding my own game, Computer Virus Simulator where almost no people are replying to the thread I made (would make one here in the WIP section but the rules for this section are too strict and read like a legal document which they absolutely shouldn't).

The key is to get yourself hyped for the game you're making when no one is responding. Here's a little Spotify playlist I've designed to help me do that (designed to be played in random order).

Another thing you might consider doing is forcing (yes, forcing) yourself to work on the game for at least 30 minutes each day, until it becomes a habit.

 

wow thank you! I knew something was off with the whole thinking about "not being good enough" and now someone finally put it into words that I can understand it's workings and what to do about it Thank you!

 

Okay - wake up go for a walk get a coffee or whatever. Come back work on your project for a while. Then later hit the gym. After you get back from the gym start working on your project again. Go eat dinner. Work on your project. Eventually watch some tv-shows. Then work on it some more, finally fall asleep.

 

This is what I like to do. I think it's extremely important to get up and out first thing, as opposed to get up and get in front of the computer. It gets you in that active mode, and kind of "tricks" your body into thinking that you're "going into work", even if you do head back home to your computer. I just think the first 30-60 minutes of your day shouldn't even be about work, although, you can start thinking about it. Even if you don't get out to get coffee, at least change to outdoor clothes, go to the kitchen, make a coffee and eat some breakfast, then start your day.

As for the loneliness thing, I also like to get out for lunch. It's just a small reminder that life is happening beyond your computer. Do some small errands, too. Pick up some groceries, go to the bank, and especially now, go shopping for Christmas presents. And if not to do something task-based, go to Starbucks or Barnes and Noble like every other hipster you see, and work on your laptop, and feel like you're living the dream, like the clip of Jonathan Blow in Indie Game.

My personal favorite is the library. Quiet enough to concentrate, but active enough to not be fully dead. With a water bottle, an acceptably cleanish bathroom, some snacks, and a laptop lock, you can make it a day marathon. I love being the guy conspicuously walking around an entire establishment looking for power outlets. Some libraries have the outlets in the floor with that little twist lock. I just use a metal bookend to pry it open and prop the lid up. The metal bookend is a tool that's plentiful in a library, especially since most of them are going unused more and more. Lol.


EDIT:
Oh, I figure someone may ask about using public wifi. I use CyberGhost VPN, so that my info is at least encrypted and my provider thinks I'm hundreds of miles away from my actual location.

 

I've worked from home a lot and there is definitely some balance needed. You need to force yourself to go out and socialize at some point or you will start to turn into crazy hermit guy. I like to have a morning and midday routine where I leave the house even if it is walking down to the local coffee shop, something to force you to shower, get dressed, and feel like a human.

 

I'm learning to look at the whole process very differently to how I used to. Still working on it. Right now for example I haven't done any of my project for a few days and I am slumping into some resistance and disillusionment. I've let myself slip and I have to remind myself of some things to get back on track. This happens. You have to keep getting things back on track.

Realize your TIME is very, very valuable. It is more important than anything. It is more important than what you use it for. It is more important than your game. You want to be saving as much time as possible, and using as little time as possible. Automation is a huge thing here. You do not want to be working hard, you want to be working LESS. It is too easy to buy into the 'work hard' paradigm. It doesn't work for me. Working less is far better. Who wants to work hard when you can work less and enjoy life?

Realize also who is in charge. You are the boss of your company, even if you are solo. Your game is not the boss. Do not put it on a pedestal or it will rob you of your power. At any opportunity your game will take away your time and monopolize it. It will turn against you. Bugs and technical issues are notorious for this. It's very easy to lose track of who is in charge and how your time is being used.

You have to keep stepping back, often, going from working IN the business to working ON the business. You have to step out of 'I'm a hard worker' shoes, and into 'I am in control of my time, I am the manager, I get to decide how my time is spent' mode. Then you have to be honest with yourself. Is how you are spending your time the best use of your time? Remember your time is valuable. If your time is valuable you don't want to waste it. Are you wasting it adding some small trivial detail or obsessing over something? Maybe you're being too perfectionistic or idealistic wanting something to be 'just right' instead of sacrificing some of that and choosing a solution that actually WORKS and gets the job FINISHED. If something is not moving toward getting it finished SOON then it's a time sink and you don't want those. Maybe you have to admit you're using to much time frivolously. Your time is valuable. Regroup. Get something done that works in less time, you can be more picky later. It is only getting stuff DONE that moves the project forward toward completion but you can't do that if you're not valuing and managing and carefully allocating your time.

Remember this has nothing to do with getting as much done in a given amount of time as possible - that's a trap that just makes you feel pressured and guilty and inadequate. You're making smart use of time, not pressured or intensified demands that are unrealistic that cause you to cram and fail and feel like you can't do it. Get rid of the entire goal of 'do as much as possible', or even 'finish as much as possible'. Trash that. Didn't work for me. Instead I now approach it as ... I will ONLY do this small step of progress today, and once it's done, that's it, I'm done. I will NOT pressure myself to make huge strides in a short space of time. If I'm doing that, the strides are too big and I need to break it down or rethink whether I'm using my time wisely. I want to deliberately make a small chunk of progress, specific, tangible, meaningful, but very discreet/limited. And I need to be in acceptance that this is GOOD ENOUGH - that I am good enough if this is all I do. I need to be satisfied with a small step. One step at a time. One day at a time. You need to stop trying to appease the game development Gods which say, "you must make massive advances within 8 hours or else you suck". #)$(*#)(*$ #)($ *)#(! them.

Small bitesized chunks. What is the next specific obvious thing you will work on? And then make sure you have something else totally unrelated to the game to spend time on. Do NOT try to use all of your spare time on the game - horrible mistake, I found. It means you have no boundaries. And it means the project absorbs you and takes over control. Instead, have some other project you love (non game, maybe non-computer), which you deliberately allow yourself to spend time doing. As you do this you're saying NO to your game and putting it in its place. You're the boss. You're in charge. Then you can also let it go, which is very important. Getting attached to the game and idolizing it and giving it all this power and importance and special value just drives you nuts. The game is not important. The process of you being creative is your joy.

Don't aim to work hard. Aim to not have to work at all. Automate. Save time. Be efficient (not fast). You want to NOT have to develop games, but instead sip your favorite beverage on a sunny beach while you rake in the dough without effort. That means not working hard, or at all (eventually). Beware the massive goal of working very hard and having a huge job or company or spending all your time night and day working on things. That's not fun.

One last big thing i found ... fear of failure. If you have ever done things wrong and have been punished or someone got hurt or you felt guilty or ashamed, you are likely now anticipating punishment. This paralyzes you and stops you from expressing yourself for fear that, if you make a mistake, you will be punished again. You have to look at that because its a fear of failing (and being punished for failing). Failing isn't the issue, its the repercussions. To heal that you have to heal the wounds and be restored and freed with truth and self-forgiveness, so that you can be open to making mistakes without fear of punishment.

Once you are open to making mistakes (and being forgiven for them, and forgiving yourself for them), you aren't afraid to fail. Being not afraid to fail allows you to take risks. Being not afraid to fail gives you strength and courage. It also pretty much empowers you with the confidence you need so that you actually don't fail, most of the time, because you know that if you do you won't get hurt. I had to work on this and once i dislodged a huge chunk of guilt and shame about some past stuff, and the fear of failure/punishment was dealt with/healed, this had an instant huge boost for me in terms of willingness to pursue my dreams, willingness to express, enthusiasm for being creative, daring to do something without worrying what people will think or how i'll be judged. And importantly, that also means I can now dismiss the PRESSURE because I am no longer allowing it to smother me and control me. Good luck.

 

Hmm... some interesting advice but here is my take...

I train in martial arts 2-3 times per week as sort of a "hobby"... at first it was about learning self defense but now I maintain it more for the social value. Find a good school where they don't just fight, but they "hug it out" too. Once you've kicked a man or a woman in the head... a hug is just no big deal and it's awesome for your heart and spirits.

I also sing in ensemble at church... again... kind of has social value outside of just my immediate family. The point is to find something else besides programming you love that involves people and then go be a part of that community... and positive communities like my examples can easily change your entire life and modes of thinking.

As for the work... set LONG term goals, set deadlines for those goals and work accordingly.... one of the most important part of goal setting though is to be realistic. When my boss hired a second programmer... for a couple of years the kid did twice as much work than I would do but he get slammed in his performance review and I wouldn't. Finally I straight up asked my boss why that was... he said to me:

"When you work... you're kind of slow... you surf the internet a lot and you listen a lot of music. I know that anytime I ask you to do a task, it's going to take longer than it should. (At that point I was starting to sweat LOL) BUT the difference is, I ask you to do a task... I know it's going to get DONE and I know you're not going to bother me about HOW to do it... when you get stuck, you've already told me you have a rule about searching for the answer on your own for a few hours before you even contemplate asking me about it. So while he gets "more" work done than you, it comes at a huge cost to me and my time which is bad because that's the whole point of hiring extra developers."

All that personal nonsense to say, however you work best, factor that time into your estimates to fulfill your goals. Goals should be slightly challenging but not impossible... if they are set too high re-evaluate, restructure and then attack the problems again.

My two cents.

 

Oh, right, experience.

I worked from home for sandswept for a while. It was going okay but then I had to go be a full time college student with a heavy schedule again. Good thing I left when I did, they switched to unreal, struggled for another few months, and then just recently pronounced the project dead.

I didn't mind it. Work for 2-4 hours, short break, work another 2-4 hours (sometimes 4 sets of 2), and then call it a day. Working continuously for 8 hours at home is more work than necessary. In an office there's plenty to distract you and those minutes add up over the day.

If you can do it, do it. It'll help everyone else and the project move forward.

 

All depends on who you are as a person.

If you start feeling very lonely and want some work related interaction you might want to try and find a shared office 'hub' for tech related work. I work at a place like that now, and thats pretty cool.
You could also do some game jams to get some friends with the same interests.

 

Thanks for the replies guys! I have been given a lot of great advice. Also I have made a Twitter to try and connect with other developers throughout the day. It's helped some. I would love to be friends with everyone having or that has had these issues so add me @lonelygamedev lol

I want to create a positive community to share work and support each other

 

I'm getting mixed signals here

 

Some great advice from all.
Just to add a little - one thing that is difficult for other (non-game developers) to understand is OUR insatiable desire to keep focused on the game industry, game development trends, latest scuttlebutt, new releases, updates, new assets, workflow improvements - etc etc. It really is consuming and rightfully so - to work smarter not harder, and to find that spark that keeps us motivated, and working on something that is HARD and fun and frustrating, and hopefully rewarding, constant information gathering, research, learning, is mandatory and kind of addicting.

So - while others are facebooking, watching the news, checking the scores, tuning their bike, changing the oil, building a book shelf, whatever - we are usually researching - gathering information on how to do this work to improve our creations.

It's enjoyable to have a friend(s) who shares your interests, and being around other people who are into the same stuff you are is fun and makes conversations easy.

A couple things I enjoy and I think increases motivation for me.
Visit the local comic book store. The people there - are into very similar stuff as we are, and it's also a cool source for inspiration and reference. Comics are great art and they are telling stories.

Look up and schedule to attend local game developer meetings.
IGDA chapter
Unity User Groups
Game demo nights
Once every other month I take a half day off work so I can travel 3.5 hours one way just to attend the closest Unity User Group. It's a long way, and a waste of gas money, and time, but the social aspect of being around like minded people who are interested in the same stuff I am interested in is really awesome. I find it refreshing and motivating.

 

First, for loneliness, as people said you basically have to go out Like, on a schedule. That works well, just schedule in time to do things regularly. I find 1-2 times per week of hardcore socializing keeps me focused on work at home.

Second, another odd trap is family who don't quite understand what working from home means. Little things throughout the day can be terribly disruptive to your work. Set clear boundaries with your spouse, kids, or roommates. Between 9-5 (or whatever) unless there is LITERALLY a fire, do not bother me

That is easier said than done though. I find I have to give the "boundaries" talk like 3-4 times a year.

 

I agree that this is a big challenge. It's especially difficult around this time of year, when you're being pulled in every direction to "celebrate" the Holidays. Visiting families, birthdays that seem to bunch up around this time, gift shopping and wrapping, scheduling, cleaning for guests, and on top of that, killing mice that find warmth from the snowy outside. It truly is the Hellidays.

It makes me jealous to read others who think the Holidays is a time to get more gamedev done. That hasn't happened for me since the early college days. It gets me really frustrated and angry, and that negativity then rubs off on everyone around me, so I've been slapped back into reality a few times, in that in order to really enjoy the Holidays, it's time to unplug. Change all of your priorities to family, and put your projects (and even your work, if that's different) on hold, because the people around you are why you get to enjoy your gamedev passion in the first place, and ultimately, gamedev won't be there for you when you're too frail to develop....

 

Working with a friend , even if online is very exciting. I know working alone is actually boring and you don't get any kind of suggestions on how to improve things or solve problems. I suggest getting a team mate Though make sure that team mate could be a good friend of yours.